KIRA: A Klingon afternoon?
ODO: Every time Klingons come to the station, I wind up with a Klingon afternoon.
-Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Season 2, "Blood Oath"
No, there are no Klingons at my house. If there were, chances are there wouldn't be a house left. It would have been claimed by the House of Martok, or whichever Klingon House came to mine.
Chances are you've heard of the song "Gangnam Style". I can't stand it. But a couple weeks ago, I told my brother that I could probably parody it if I liked it enough to learn the words. (I have to learn the words to get down the rhythm, and have my words match that rhythm. It can get very difficult at times.) This morning, I was watching an episode of DS9 with Worf and a Klingon lawyer (AHHHHHH!!!!). The Klingon lawyer got Worf angry enough that Worf hit him. I said, "Yes! The fate of all space lawyers: A good punch-Klingon style!" Inspired by my normal Trek commentary, I looked up the English lyrics to Gangnam Style...
...and an English-to-Klingon translator.
Yes, that's right. I'm writing "Opa Klingon Style". I had to change of the words around to get an exact translation, or the best that can be expected from a language that doesn't have a word for "lovable", "guy", "cools", "bursts", and about a dozen other things (like "jolly"). For example, if you've read the English version for this song, you will recognize this part of it:
I’m a guy
A guy who is as warm as you during the day
A guy who one-shots his coffee before it even cools down
A guy whose heart bursts when night comes
That kind of guy
Read more: http://www.kpoplyrics.net/psy-gangnam-style-lyrics-english-romanized.html#ixzz2YU0C0DEs
In order to have that translated into Klingon, I had to change it to this:
I am a warrior
A warrior who is as hot as you in the day
A warrior who one-shots his coffee before it even cold down
A warrior whose heart explodes when night comes
That kind of warrior
That in Klingon is:
SuvwI' jIH.
SuvwI' 'Iv je tuj law' SoH jaj
SuvwI' 'Iv wa'-bach pa' vabDot bIr vI'ogh qa'vIn
SuvwI' jor tIq cholDI' ram
SuvwI' bIquv
I have the whole song translated. As soon as I learn the rhythm and maybe learn how to format a video and get a good audio file of it, I could put it up on YouTube. It will be a cry for Trekkies EVERYWHERE. *EXAGGERATION ALERT*
But there's one problem...
I don't speak Klingon.
Klingon is a lot like German. Given time, a healthy throat, and a webpage full of Klingon songs that I know and remember, I could do it. But there are some words that I need to hear to be able to mimic. Before I was writing this, I was working on a pronunciation guide that I can read and it will make things easier. The above Klingon in my pronunciation guide is like this:
soovwee zhee
soovwee eve zhe toozh lah soh zhazh
soovwee eve wah-bahc pah vahb-Doht beer vee-ohg kah-veen
soovwee zhor teek chole-DEE ram
soovwee beekoov
That is my best guess. I started this project at around 11 AM. It's the easiest parody I've done, beating out even "I'm David and I Know It" (a parody of "I'm Sexy and I Know It"- have you seen David Tennant? *swoon*), and I wrote that in a little less than an hour. The words are already there for this. I just had to feed them into Bing's translator. I have to say that, while Google wasn't cool enough to add Klingon to its list of translatable languages, it beats out Bing because it will say the words for you in any language it has. That would have made things much quicker, Bing.
Anyone out there speak Klingon? have an English-to-Klingon dictionary with accompanying tape? who just so happens to be a Klingon, as unlikely as that is? Your help would be appreciated, but if the above does not apply to anyone, then I'll live.
It's been a very Klingon afternoon.
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