Temporal Mechanics: The Predestination Paradox

So we've debunked the Butterfly Effect. That was simple. But not all paradoxes can be debunked.

Like the Predestination Paradox. The Predestination Paradox is where a time traveller is caught in a loop that makes him go back in time to repeat the action which sent him back in time. 

Can you see where I'm coming from? Maybe not. Even for me, without an example it doesn't make a lot of sense.

There's an episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation called "Cause and Effect" where the Enterprise-D is caught in what they call a temporal causality loop. It screwed me up something fierce when I first watched it, because before the theme song, the Enterprise blew up while Picard was telling everybody to abandon ship, and then when we came back from commercial break, Riker, Worf, Data, and Beverly were playing poker as if they hadn't just blown up, and then it happened again. And again. And again, each with a strange sense of deja vu and with them all having premonitions. Beverly knew Geordi was going to come into Sickbay with headaches that were making him dizzy (his visor was picking up the loop). They all knew the cards Data was going to draw, that is, except for the last time. They explain it all at the end. They were going to crash into a ship from about 60, 70 years earlier and there were two options to avoid it, Lieutenant Commander Data's solution, which caused them to travel back in time in the first place, or Will Riker's solution, which would end the loop. They used Data's idea every time except the last time.

The time before last, Data programmed a message into his brain that would subconsciously tell him what to do the next time around. The message appeared in all sorts of places. During the poker game, Data subconsciously stacked the deck so that the first four cards he drew were all threes, then the next 12 cards gave everyone three-of-a-kind. In an Engineering situation, he made every number on the screen threes. The significance of the number three was the number of pips on Riker's uniform, meaning his solution was correct, thus freeing the Enterprise from the loop.

Does it make sense now? Yes? No?

For the "no's", let's put it this way: Let's call "A" the first event of the day. "B" is the second event of the day. "C" is the third event of the day and "D" is the event which causes the people involved to go back in time to event "A" and live it all over again. A>B>C>D>A>B>C>D>A>B>C>D>A, etc., etc., etc., until event "E" occurs that breaks the loop, making it A>B>C>E. It's like being stuck in a rut, doing the same thing day after day, until you do something different to break yourself from the rut.  

There. Is that better?

Yes? Good. That's it for now.

The Nerdist

I watch Doctor Who a lot. A lot. But today I saw a commercial and actually paid attention to it. It was a commercial for a new BBC-America show called "The Nerdist". It sounded so awesome. Chris Hardwick, the host, really seemed to get my viewpoint on nerds. "You might think that there's only one kind of nerd," he said, "but you would be WRONG!" Yes! He gets it! Yes! I'm going to have to watch the first episode of this. It airs the same day as the new episodes of Doctor Who. So I went onto the menu and searched for it. The first two episodes I saw were entitled, "Tribute to Nerd Girls" and "Tribute to Time Travel", in which he will discuss the possibility of time travel. Epic! It comes on Friday, March 29, 2013, at 4 in the morning. I'll be able to watch it before school! Wait, I don't even have school that day! Awesome!

Well, that's it for that. Onto more paradoxes.

Temporal Mechanics: The Butterfly Effect

Probably the most confusing bit about time travel are all the paradoxes. One such is the Butterfly Effect.

Apparently, the belief is that if you go back in time and step on a butterfly, you could change the course of human events. Let's examine that, shall we?

Forget that time travel is impossible with our current technology. Let's say that you go back in time to 1855 and you step on a butterfly. Oh, my, what's going to happen now?

Logic says, absolutely nothing. How could stepping on a butterfly change the course of human events? It's a butterfly! One, they're flying insects. They're extremely difficult to squish. The only possible way you'd be able to squish one is if your time machine and said butterfly happen to come into the same space at the same point in time. Okay, I can believe that. At best, the only thing you know before you land is that you're not landing on anything very big, such as a person or a cat. A butterfly? Only the most advanced sensors could pick that up. So let's go with that for the time being.

You squished a butterfly with your time machine. How can butterflies possibly change the course of human history? If you don't believe in evolution, then maybe you could say that God (big "G", little "g", whatever you believe) chose that butterfly to do something great. I mean, if He does it with humans, why shouldn't he do it with the other animals He created? Well, if He needs that butterfly for something, why didn't He save it? Well, maybe that butterfly was chosen to be the catalyst for the beginning of a butterfly takeover (that opens up so much for humor, but I'm going to try to stay on topic, letting dozens of jokes blow in the wind), thus all is right with the world: That butterfly was going to be stepped on anyway, it just happened sooner than intended.

Come on, a butterfly takeover? Look at a butterfly's brain: If it was advanced enough to take over, there'd already be a city somewhere with a government arranged by butterflies. Get. Real.

So, what about evolution? Well, it's safe to assume that if butterflies could change the course of human history, a number of genetic mutations would have to occur before that time, and over several centuries. Well, if those genetic mutations were supposed to happen anyway, the space-time continuum will adapt around it. There are thousands upon thousands of butterflies, at the very least. All you'll have done was create an alternate universe that likely looks a lot like yours until some point far in the future, where it will still look a lot like yours except the butterflies will have different genetic code in that universe than in the other.

If you travel into the future and step on a butterfly, same thing: You won't change the past, just the future, and if the butterflies haven't conquered the universe by then, sorry, Mr. Monarch-Butterfly, it's going to be a while before that happens. But hang in there, I'm sure you'll get lucky one of these days.

So you might as well get rid of the Butterfly Effect altogether, because unless I missed something, it really doesn't make any sense.

Temporal Mechanics -- Part one of many.....

Time travel can be complicated.  Just listening to characters in popular sci-fi TV makes my mom cringe.

"A leads to B leads to C leads to A...
"A is an explosion in the 29th century. Debris from Voyager's hull is found in evidence. I [Captain Braxton] go back in time to destroy you.
"B. You try to stop me, disabling my weapon which causes me to crash-land back here in the 20th century.
"C. Someone in this century steals my time-ship and launches it. They go to the future and once there, they make one critical mistake which cause a terrible explosion that takes us all the way back to A. There's an explosion in the 29th century - the cycle of causality is complete!"

-Captain Braxton (1996), Star Trek: Voyager

Have I lost you yet?  Let's try another.

"People assume that time is a strict progression of cause to effect, but actually, from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint, it's more like a big ball of wobbly-wobbly, timey-wimey stuff."

-The 10th Doctor, Doctor Who

And from someone who shares my mom's opinion: 

"I hate temporal mechanics..."

-Miles O'Brien to his future self, Star Trek: Deep Space Nine

That's probably the average person's reaction to time travel, come to think of it, but it's actually quite simple to a flexible mind. When my mom and I watch Doctor Who,  my mom asks me so many questions, usually the same questions each time.

      "Why can't the Doctor go back in his own time line?" (He might run into himself and say the wrong thing, or cause a paradox. Also, there are too many Doctors at the same time. It can't possibly go well.)

      "How did the Doctor know to go there?" (Amy told him.)
      "But she's stuck in the TARDIS." (Yeah, she tells him in the future.)
      "How does that do him any good?" (After all this is over, the Doctor takes Amy a couple days into the past and leaves him a message. )

Wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey. I always try to explain everything, but it just seems that some people just can't 'get' time travel.

And there is all that stuff about paradoxes, methods for time travel, time travel in Star Trek, and the scientific possibility of time travel........  So much to discuss, so little time.  And then there's the butterfly effect.  More on that later.

Thursday

Thursday was "Throwback Thursday" in Spirit Week. We were supposed to dress the way we did in middle or elementary school. So I showed up in socks that were purchased 8 years ago, my Heelys which I wore through 5th and 6th grades, my uniform shirt, my fleece jacket from middle school which was actually Andrew's because mine got too small for me, and a pair of jeans that were purchased when I was in seventh grade.

Thursday, I got totally loopy. During 6th period, my teacher was having us play a review game in math. By the end of the period only 7 people, including me, were still playing. One of the jerky girls kept talking back to me when I volunteered to move to the front of my row because the girl in front of me wanted to stop playing but didn't want to get up, but who cares about her? It's like she had nothing better to do than speak to me when I didn't talk to her. Okay, yes, I know the answer in my head but I can't get it out. Is that any reason for you to say, "Then you don't know, then." ? No, no it's not. I was engaged in conversation with the girl in front of me. I told the teacher, "I don't think she wants to play anymore." so I stood up and moved to the front of the row. She said, "I'm still playing." I asked her, "Do you want me to answer questions or go back and sit down?" "I'll answer questions." So I moved of my own volition. You don't have to say, "Sit back down, then." It's not your job, so shut up. Don't expect me to help you anymore. You're not in charge of the world. Just shut up. She's not the cause of my loopiness. About a half-hour before the end of class, I ended up staying near the front with a senior who was loopy already. It rubbed off on me, so I was completely hyper but still able to work on math. But I kept singing, "Ain't nothin' on the top but a bucket and a mop and an illustrated book about birds..." It was so catchy! I kept dancing during gym class because of my hyperness. I regained my sanity before the end of gym, though.

After lunch, a basketball game was held. In the gym. Likely you've been in a school gymnasium before, and so you know how much sound resonates. Also, I'm super-sensitive to sounds. I melt down. So, naturally, I didn't even step into the gym. Didn't do much good, but I was able to survive for a while longer than I would have been inside of the gym. People kept asking me, "You don't want to watch the basketball game?" And I responded, "It would be better for all parties involved if I stayed out here." and gave them the short explanation. They understood. I ended up being escorted up to the office, anyway, though, because I melted. Luckily, the drama teacher happened to walk by at that exact moment.

After school was parent teacher conferences. We talked to Mrs. Hrdlicka, Mrs. Crockett, Mr. Drennen, the guitar teacher that I don't even have, and Mr. Pace, one of the history teachers.

Then we had what I call Mexican Lasagna, because it was layered and had ingredients that you would find in a standard dish found at a Mexican restaurant, which was very delicious, and Andrew and I played Lego Batman. And I'm off today, and next week!

Wednesday

First: Mom told me to get rid of Tuesday's post, labelled "Tuesday", and her reasons made sense, so don't go looking for it.

Second: Wednesdays are pretty good days during the school day. It's usually after-school when things get bad. But since Adjudication is over, Mrs. Crockett said we didn't have to stay after anymore until after Spring Break. Thus, Wednesday, Super-Hero Day (I was Batman-a lovely Batman of the 4. I happen to think I was the best. One had only a cape and took it off sometime during first period. Another had a Batman shirt that was purple. Batman's not purple. The other was the only dude being Batman that I saw and made a Batman symbol out of duct tape which was pretty cool. He's a nice guy and accepted that the rivalry I postulated was false and all in good fun. I had a cape that I got from Six Flags, a Batman shirt that I borrowed from Andrew, Halloween socks that have bats on them, and the belt from a karate costume my mom made for my Pikachu several years ago. Amazing that Pikachu's waist is the same size as my head.), was wonderful. I gave my report on the phylum Arthopoda, insects, but I had to give it by myself because my partner, a drummer, was at band Adjudication. So I gave it by myself.

I think I did a pretty good job. I was really excited about it, so excited that I was asked by my classmates to slow down. I said, "Sorry, I'm just really excited and my pulse is racing." I know I got all 4's (a 100%) from one of my classmates.

Before the report, I was called to take my Geometry benchmark during Freshman Literature, which was good because I was having a lot of difficulty thinking. The benchmark was enough to break up the streak and restore me to my thinking self. Lovely. By the time I was done, it was time to go to second period. So I left, went up to the fourth floor and Mrs. Crockett's room, and opened the door.

"Yay! Katie's back!" Assorted clapping. I slowly placed my bag beside my usual desk and said, "It's like I just came home from war." A little laughter. Apparently Mrs. Crockett mark me as absent because she thought I went to band adjudication. Nope. "No, I went to take my benchmark." I said, laughing slightly, still happy and surprised about my warm reception. My friend Taylor had attempted to fill in for me teaching sight-singing, and she wasn't able to rally the class the way I do. This is not ego, she told me. Also I've watched her in action. She asked me for help. We didn't do any sight-singing that day.

Then Biology. I love biology. Science, with the exception of seventh grade, has been my favorite for several years. In seventh grade, the teacher was very difficult to comprehend. She talked too fast and scared me a bit. All I really remember learning was that plants live longer in green Gatorade. I know why, too. It's the green-ness. Biology was mostly just phylum reports. Porifera through Echinoderms in evolutionary order. The adjudication people are going to have to redo theirs Monday after next because they weren't there.

During History, we had an assembly. There's a college in St. Paul, Minnesota, that actually kind of teaches you to be the traditional model of a pop star. It's epic. It teaches the producing, writing, and promotion of music, plus there's an electric department for DJs and the like. They came to Central to recruit and ended up just being awesome. I bought a CD from a girl who plays a mini guitar thing, the piano, and can sing at the same time. I asked her how she did it. She said lots of practice.

So now I can do it, too! Yes! And that's it for this entry.

Adjudication

Well, today was Adjudication. It was held at McKinley Classical Leadership Academy. The angel never imagines the return to hell. Yeah, that's right. I said it. I still remember where my locker was!

When I was in seventh grade, I went to McKinley for a semester. I can't seem to remember any meltdowns. Mostly what I did was be angry and complain. The science teacher must have hated me. The nurse was better. I'll get to Central's nurse at a later date. The teachers tried, but there were just some things they weren't able to do. I remember my class schedule: Literature with Ms. Hemmer, second floor, not far from my locker; Concert Choir with Mrs. Simms (I couldn't remember her name until today), third floor, switched up occasionally with the computer science room across the hall; Study Hall with Mrs. Gregory, lovely English teacher, had a better Christmas party there than I did in Ms. Hemmer's class; American History with Mr. Gutzler, third floor, very large door, nice guy. When the Algebra teacher took my schedule on the first day, I sat not far outside his room, crying in the hallway, he was very gentle and told me to go to the main office, telling me the directions; Gym with Mr...Hoffman, I think? Nice guy. Looked like your typical Gym teacher, not the large tall kind with the deep voice, the thin almost-tall kind with a tenor voice; Art with Mrs. Simpson. I liked her. In the middle of that was lunch; Pre-Algebra with Mrs. Sivaprasad. Meanest math teacher you'll ever meet, and I'm usually on the teacher's side; Physical Science with Mrs. Anderson. I was so glad that was the last period of the day. It was the worst science class I've ever taken. She talked too fast. It was a sixth grade class. Often some 7th graders would say, "Hey, sixth grader! Get out of our lunch!" I hated telling them I was a 7th grader. I didn't mind telling the sixth graders so much. They were cool about it. "Are you a 7th grader?" "Naw, man, she's in Mrs. Anderson's class!" "Really," I would say, and then pull out my binder, which had my schedule on the front: "Schleicher, Katherine; Grade: 7". I loved their reactions.

Anyway, I felt the strangest sense of deja vu with a completely known origin. Everything was just the same. A bit cleaner. I kept close to my friend Taylor both because I like Taylor and for a root to the present. "I wonder if Isabella's still here?" Isabella was one of my friends in middle school, a year younger than me. She's still there.

The first school to perform was McKinley. Pretty good. I can't remember the full order, but I think about 4th was our Glee club. Perfect. Flaw-less!

Then came Roosevelt. Roosevelt and Glee sang one of the same songs, "Elijah Rock". Glee's was magnificent. Roosevelt SUCKED!! Royally! They were constantly off-key, flat, sharp, out of sync, even at the parts where they weren't supposed to be singing the same parts simultaneously. It was absolutely atrocious. We were last. My fingers were sweating. Lucky for me I had a robe with large folds that I could wipe the sweat off on. But I kept scratching. I was very itchy. All on stage, all within view of about 150+ people. And I breathed at the wrong times. But the rest of us were good.

The first song was "I Am In Need of Music" by David L. Brunner. The second was a song from "Missa Kenya" called "Gloria" by Paul Basler.

Here's "I am in Need of Music": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJjyWh6U3f4

(S, A) I am in need of music
(SATB) I am in need of music that would flow
(SA) Over my fretful feeling finger tips
[(TB) Flow-]
(SA) Over my bitter tainted trembling lips
[(TB) Flow-]
(1S, A) With melody
(2S) Melody, deep, clear, and liquid slow
[(1S) Deep, clear, slow]
[(A) With melody deep and liquid slow, liquid slow]
[(TB) Melody, deep, clear and liquid slow-]
(S) Oh for the healing swaying old and low
[(A) I am in need of music]
[(TB) Oh-h, for the healing swaying old and low]
(TB) Of some song
(SATB) Of some song
[(1S) Sung to rest the tired dead]
(SA) A song, a song to fall like water on my head and over quivering limbs
[(A) Dream-] (1S, SA) Dream flushed to glow
(TB) There is a magic made by melody
(1S, SATB) A magic made my melody
(SATB) There is a magic made by melody, A spell of rest and quiet breath And
(1S, S) Cool heart that sinks through fading colors deep. To the subaqueous stillness of the sea
[(ATB) cool heart cool heart deep, To the stillness of the sea]
(SA) And floats forever in a moon-green pool
(ST) And floats forever in a moon-green pool
[(A) Floats forever in the arms, in the arms of rhythm, rhythm]
[(B) ????]
(1S, S) Held in the arms [(T) ????] held in the arms of rhythm, rhythm
(SATB) And of sleep
(A) Held in the arms
(T) Held in the arms
(B) Held in the arms
(S) Held in the arms
(A) Held in the arms
(T) Held in the arms of rhythm
(B) Held in the arms of rhythm
(S) Held in the arms of rhythm
(SATB) And of sleep
(SATB) Sleep...

Here's "Gloria": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjQfcuo2b-Q
Not the version I would have preferred, but it didn't show another choir singing it so it was the best one. The solo is supposed to be a tenor, and it's not "pax (pox)", it's "pax (pah)"

(Tenor Solo)Gloria in excelcis Deo
(SATB)Et intera pax hominibus bonae voluntatis
(TS)Laudamus te
(SATB)Benedicimus te
(TS)Adoramus te
(SATB)Glorificamus te
(TS)Gratia agimus
(SATB)Tibi propter
(TS)Magnam gloriam
(SATB)Gloria tuam
(TS)Gloria in excelcis Deo
(SATB)Et intera pax hominibus bonae voluntatis
(TS)Domine Deus
(SATB)Domine Deus
(TS)Domine Deus
(SATB)Domine Deus, Domine Deus rex coelestis Deus pater omnipotens
(SATB) Domine fili uni genite Jesu Christe
(TS) Domine Deus
(SATB) Domine Deus
(TS) Domine Deus
(SATB) Domine Deus, Domine Deus agnus Dei filius patris
(TS) Qui tolis peccata mundi
(SATB) Mi se re re, mi se re re nobis
(TS) Qui tolis peccata mundi
(SATB) Succi pe de pre cationem nostram
(TS) Que sedes ad dexteram Patris
(SATB) Mi se re re, mi se re re nobis, mi se re re, mi se re re nobis, mi se re re, mi se re re nobis, mi se re re, mi se re re nobis
(TS) Quo niam tu solus sanctus Dominus
(SATB) Dominus tu solus altisimus Jesu Christe Dominus
(TS) Cum sancto spiritu in gloria dei patris, Gloria, Gloria
(SATB) Cum sancto spiritu in gloria dei patris, sancto spiritu in gloria dei patris, sancto spiritu in gloria dei patris, sancto spiritu in gloria dei patris

(TS) Amen, Amen, Amen

(SATB) Amen, Amen, Amen

Enjoy, and imagine me singing in there in that group. Just know that we were better. :)

Monday

Yesterday was Monday. Lovely.

Yesterday, in our second school Spirit Week, it was Movie Monday. I was dressed as a Jedi.

Can you believe that hardly anybody could guess who I was?

Rodney said, "You're a wizard." NO
One of my other friends said, "You're a monk." NO
Some dude in my history class said, "You're Harry Potter." Do you see a wand in my hand? NO
Some people didn't even get it when I showed them my lightsaber.
Someone even thought I was Darth Vader. No, Darth Vader has a mask. No mask on my face.

The day before Adjudication. Mrs. Crockett was occupied with administrative Adjudication stuff, so what we did was we rehearsed without her. And without the piano. And we sounded pretty good. I mean, except for the Altos, who either do not think that what we do is music (I mean it, I've heard someone say, "When I'm not singing this, when I'm singing, you know, real music..."), are only sitting in the Alto section because it's the back row (some of them really sound like Sopranos.), or really have a lot of difficultly with remembering their part or saying the Latin words. My friend Ashleigh had trouble with this. I can't blame them for that.

I received a project in Biology. We finally got to evolution and taxonomy! Yes! Animals and such and Carl Linnaeus! That's my favorite! So we have to make a poster and presentation that demonstrates mastery of the subject. I joined forces with my drummer friend and our poster is about arthropods, specifically insects. So there's a ginormous beetle in the middle of the poster. My drummer friend can draw, too. Lovely. I hate bugs, and I was psyched! It's all so awesome! When they evolved. How they evolved their wings. Did you know that an insect's wings may have originally evolved as a means to help the insect body absorb heat and later became a tool for flight? Did you know that wings are not a modified appendage but an extension of the cuticle? That way insects can fly without sacrificing walking legs, as opposed to birds and bats, whose wings are modified appendages and they are quite clumsy on the ground. See? It's awesome! Insects don't have lungs, you know. I don't remember exactly what they have. I'll tell you tomorrow.

A lovely Monday, and despite Mrs. Crockett shouting at us, we did pretty good at Adjudication. So did Glee Club. New entry time!

Weird slang words

This blog entry will be continually edited.

Friday, March 8, 2013, 8:45:20 PM - 9:15:20 PM

Earlier, I stated that I could not understand the slang words I often heard at school. One of those words was "drove". I don't care what you say, the word "drove" means the past tense of drive, i.e. I drove somewhere. But apparently it has another meaning now which makes no sense. On Wednesday, we were discussing which Romeo and Juliet movie we liked better. This one girl in my class said that the ending to the Leonardo Di Caprio version was "hella drove". I know basically what hella means. It's an adjective which intensifies anything. It's basically a swear word you can say without swearing. So I looked up "drove" on the Urban Dictionary. For those unaware, it means "mad or angry" or "acting really ghetto" or "crazy". But get this: "Drove originates from the north side of St. Louis County." I live there! Well, not exactly there, but in the area which is classified as St. Louis. South St. Louis, really. But we have our own words!

I still don't like it, but at least I understand it.

Now for the word "thick". One of my acquaintances once said that she was too "thick" to do the Thriller dance. Yeah, sure, I'm pretty much incapable of dancing, but you can't dance? I thought all African-American people could dance. That may be a little insensitive, but hey, I have little social experience. I still don't think it's a legitimate statement, but the definition that seemed to apply most was "a woman with a perfect body, filled-in places that are, by nature, designed to attract the opposite sex, such as the thighs, the hips, the breasts, and" - keep in mind that I did not write this, clearly some dude with overactive hormones did- "the most lovely part of all, the booty." It's a little sexually insensitive to me, but if people willingly call themselves that, who am I to say that it shouldn't exist?

I still don't like it.

Now for a proper definition of the word "hella". Oh, it's just a substitute for "really" or "very". Seriously? Just use really and very. You're not Californian, so stop using a word from California. If California made jumping off of cliffs cool, would you do it? Yeah, if you were an idiot!

I can't stop writing!

This is my fourth post today in the last two hours! I can't stop! Gaaah! I even ran out of stuff to talk about!

Well, there is that... but do I really want to bring that up?
Nah.

"1984" by George Orwell has got to be the greatest sci-fi book of all time. Earlier this week, Gabby brought a copy to school and near the end of breakfast, I not-so-subtlely grabbed the book and opened it to the first page. Awesomeness reigns supreme. The concepts, the plot, the stuff with O'Brien...spoliers! "Big Brother is Watching You.", the concept of Newspeak. You know, I use Newspeak.

It's a word I call mindsee. It also has extensions, "sciencesee", "mathsee", "wordsee", and their relative extensions. And no, Rodney, there is no "foreign-language-see", okay? It's too easy, and the rules of mindsee don't apply to it. You know you possess a particular mindsee if you can hear an explanation of a certain thing once and bam! you get it. My Biology teacher once referred to this as "*snap* Math." I possess sciencesee. I love science. Cracking the universe? Yeah, that's awesome! My mom has mathsee. Sure, everyone knows their eights and nines. I know my twelves off the top of my head up to 12*6 and 100/8 (12.5, by the way). My mom knows her 17's. I just asked her what 17*17 was, and in less than 10 seconds she told me it was 289, and she was right. Shakespeare had wordsee. Wordsee works different than the other mindsee's, in that words are very simple, compared to science and math. Wordsee involves using words brilliantly and perfectly, in intriguing ways, and make a compelling story when put together in the right order. All writers have wordsee to some degree.

Well, I'm out.

Nerds, Geeks, and Dorks

So this one day last semester, it was a Monday, my school had a Spirit Week. The first day was Nerd Day. Awesome! So I dressed myself in my Star Trek shirt and black pants and pinned my Starfleet combadge pin to my shirt in its appropriate place and when I got to school...everyone was dressed in an imitation of Steve Irkel. The announcements were themed. The music they played before them was the Star Wars theme. Funny. I like that theme. But then they started talking.

It was extremely offensive. One of the girls sounded asthmatic, and she hasn't sounded like that before. Ever. And at the end when she said our school slogan ("Where arts and academics share center stage") she said, "Where arts and academics - academics are my favorite - share center stage". Okay, that's the last straw. That's mean. Really mean.

Allow me to clarify. I am a stereotypical nerd. But that doesn't mean I have no friends, can't talk about anything except science, or love academics more than life itself. I'm in an art school, man! You think that's the case?

You won't find this definition anywhere else. A nerd is someone who has a particular obsession, is likely smart enough to understand the physics of the universe in which that obsession functions, but is still able to function in normal society, engage in social relationships, talk to people about normal everyday stuff. I am a nerd. My obsession is sci-fi, specifically time travel, I am smart enough to understand the science of it, but I can still work in an area where my obsession does not factor. I stand out, yeah, but if I dressed like a standard teenager, you'd never know just by looking at me. 

A geek is someone who is hyper-obsessed with a particular academic subject, is hyper-intelligent about that particular subject, and have difficulty understanding social interactions and has trouble interacting with people who don't also fit into their geek niche.

A dork is a combination of a nerd and a geek. They are hyper-obsessed with something, anything, are very smart, but have great difficulty dealing with anybody outside their social circle. 

I am a nerd.

Steve Irkel is a geek.

Sheldon Cooper is a dork.

That's how it works out with these definitions. Hopefully, you'll never misclassify anyone ever again. And remember, we weirdos have feelings, too.

Geometry

"Angle 1 is complementary to Angle 2, and Angle 2 is supplementary to Angle 3. (Complementary means the two angles equal 90 and Supplementary means the two angles equal 180). If Angle 1 equals 80, find Angles 2 & 3." With all that, it seems pretty simple, right? You wouldn't have to ask someone how to do it when you did it in class a dozen times about a week ago.

And yet some people simply can not do it.

I've said before, I'm a genius. I'm a freshman in Geometry with a bunch of jerky sophomores who don't know how to shut up and do their work but expect an A even when they don't do anything. So of course they all ask to copy off of the smart girl's work even though they didn't even know my name 3 weeks ago. Yeah, sure, you've been my friend the whole time. You can't fool me. You're a leech.

But at the beginning of the semester, this guy started hanging around me. It was really creepy. He has Geometry, too, two periods before me, and he's a sophomore. So he came to lunch today with a Geometry workbook and started to work on an assignment that was assigned a little while ago. He asked me, "Katie, how do you do this?" Okay, I'll explain it once. I'll do that. I will tell you anything you want to know. I will show you how to do it. I'll help you get to the answer, though I won't give you the answer. I will do all this so that you don't ask me repeatedly how to do it. Sure, I'll help you with each of the problems. But if you ask me repeatedly how to solve the exact same problem and cannot get it right without me doing it for you, you don't need a genius friend. You need a personal tutor. Also, he's really, really, really hard to understand. He almost-whispers everything, even when he shouts, and he often talks with his hand in front of his mouth. He claims that he has trouble making friends and that's why he hangs around me. That never stopped me! Just jump into it.

He must have more social disabilities than I have, because I have shown all the external signs that I want him to leave. I can't say it out loud. I'm too nice. I've told him that I don't like to be touched, and I've told him twice that I have a slightly overactive gag reflex, and yet when I cough at breakfast, he still pats my back. Stop it, okay, just stop! And I've told him, when I hang around Gabby and the rest of my friends, don't start a separate conversation, and yet...yep, you guessed it. He doesn't need me to tell him everything. If you made a mistake, don't come to me for advice, ask the teacher for crying out loud! I don't care about anime, and you don't care about Doctor Who. We have absolutely nothing in common, why are you still hanging around? You are no more than an acquaintance. And dude, yes, you accidentally closed out of your Biology benchmark, but you don't need me to pray for you. Go ask Mr. Allchurch if you can retake your test. He's a nice guy. He'll understand. Ask Mrs. Hrdlicka for help on your Geometry. She's the teacher. It's her job. If she sees you're trying, she'll feel a sense of worth. Say hi, sure, but I choose my friends carefully. And if I consider you my friend, you don't have to ask. You'll know. He asked. I was torn between telling him the truth he didn't want to hear, or the lie that he wanted to hear. He doesn't get me. My friends get me. They know what I mean, so I don't have to explain myself all that frequently. We have similar interests, so I can make Doctor Who and smart people jokes and they get them.

Seriously, man, get a life, and stop trying to live mine alongside me.

And for God's sake, get some help on your math from somebody other than me.

And that's what I wish I could say.

But I can't.

I'm too nice.

Master of Time

I could so be a Time Lord. Seriously. I am a Master of Time. This is my own title, self-given, but at my school, nobody wears a watch. And with the administration cracking down on cell phones out in class, people have been asking me more and more what time it is. And I know exactly what time, to the second, all the bells ring. A whole bunch of bells ring during 3rd/7th period (we divide up the days, 4 90-minute classes per day with a 30-minute lunch and 5 minutes between classes, except on Friday when they are all 8 40-minute classes with a 30-minute lunch and 4 minutes between classes. See I told you.) and I timed them all, so that I know exactly when to leave.

And you know what?

They change.

Each day the times the bells ring are always a second later than they were the day before, and there are a few milliseconds of difference between when one bell rings and the next bell rings. For example, one bell rings at 8:40:33 (it's supposed to be 8:43:00) and the next rings at 10:18:32 (it's supposed to be 10:21:00). And still, I know when each bell will ring. Nobody else thinks much of it, but in a world where routines are uncommon with the general populace, I try to find all of the ones I can. It may look like supernatural ability to the people who just don't care, but it's really simple. You want to know the secret?

Wear a watch with a second hand and identify the stuff that happens at the same time everyday. Track it. Time is not the boss of you.

Wibbly-wobbly. Timey-wimey.

"You look human"...

"No, you look Time Lord." That's one of my favorite Doctor Who quotes. And it seems to apply to me the most. I'm Autistic. I haven't said that yet. I haven't said anything yet, but I digress. People befuddle me. Some have told me that they have a learning disability, and that's why their grades are so low, and I say, "Yeah, so do I." I'm open about my Autism. Why shouldn't I be? I'm not embarrassed. Look at me, I'm a genius! My friends and the ever-constant complainers who are not my friends but seem to hang around anyway can't believe that Katie, the girl who knows everything, has a learning disability. They're always surprised, but once I explain, they get it. At least my friends do. Teenagers have a very short attention span, have you ever noticed that?

What I can never figure out is why people were such good friends at one point in time, but once they get to high school, they act like they've been at war all their lives. I hesitate to talk about other people's problems, but for this particular befuddlement, I have to mention this. When I walked into my friendship with my best friend Gabby, I walked into a social war. No names from this point on.

So Girl A and Gabby were best friends in middle school. Gabby's said this before. But now Girl A is trying to separate our entire group, or at least she was during the first semester. Girl B, Girl C, Girl D, an I are sticking around, no questions asked. (I personally don't care if Gabby was Genghis Khan, she's nice to me, doesn't touch my stuff, and gets me. That's hard to find, believe me.) But I'm friends with both Girl A and everyone in my group. I have a lot of difficulty empathizing with people, so when someone I like and who likes me is upset, I offer moral support. So last night, I was having musical fun with Girl A. We're both singers, of course we know each other. But later in the night, Girl B was crying. Moral support time! Something Girl A did upset Girl B, I'm not even go to try to connect everything, I don't want to know, I don't need to know. But then it looked like Girl A was crying as well. I asked, "Are you crying, too?" She said no, and I said, "Oh, good, I don't want to have conflicting moral support." She understood what I meant, so there was nothing wrong there. But I can't side with both people.

And that's where my disability comes in. All that normal behavior you expect out of teenagers you will not find in me. So how am I supposed to know what to do with people? This is the biggest group of friends I've had since kindergarten. I suck at making friends. And it's really hard to get past all the nonstop cursing and "hella's", "finna's", the over-and-improper use of the word "drove" and "thick" (what does it even mean when you say "I'm too thick for this"?), and "I'm crackin' up", so I just can't get down to the deepest levels of social principles. Everything's just wrong to me. They look human, and so do I, but maybe I'm just a Time Lord. Wait a minute. *checks for the number of hearts* Nope, just a human. Darn.

First things first...

Hello. I've always felt it was polite to say "hello" first, haven't you?

Anywho, very few of you will know what "Harmenszoon" means. Some of you will. But you know the painter, Rembrandt? Did you know that his last name is not Rembrandt? It's his first name. One day, a Friday, a friend of mine brought a crossword puzzle into Biology. Unable to resist a good puzzle, my entire table decided to help solve it, but the one clue that riddled me the most was "Rembrandt van ____" Rembrandt wasn't his last name? So two periods later, I looked it up. His name was Rembrandt Harmenszoon van Rijn. Yay! Wait, "Harmenszoon"? What? What kind of a middle name is that? And so, Harmenszoon! It's one of my slogans now. It joined such things as "Let's eat this whole eggnog" and "Orange juice is the holy land." (long story-maybe I'll tell it sometime).

My name is Katie. Well, not really, but as far as you're concerned, it's Katie. If you've read my Mom's blog, you've heard of me. If not, you haven't. I am a writer. Sci-fi is awesome. I've tried to write fantasy, mystery, fairy tale, realistic fiction, you name it, I've tried it. But nothing worked except sci-fi. I'm a nerd. And for those who think that a nerd is Steve Irkel, change your thinking, because I can tell you, it's not, but I'll get to that later, too.

Very recently, I've gotten into Doctor Who. I'm pretty much an expert on the reboot, at least everything that's been aired so far. I don't know anything about Clara Oswin Oswald. From time to time, you may hear me go on and on about Who. As recently as 2009, I got into Star Trek, and now I've seen every episode of the 24th century series (TNG, DS9, VOY). Enterprise sucks, by the way. It needs more Porthos. So you may hear me go on and on about Trek. I've been a Star Wars nerd ever since I first played "Star Wars: Lego". Fun game. I will not likely go on and on about Star Wars, but you never know. Loved dogs forever. That's going to be a lot more of a likely topic, but the most likely topic is going to be people. They befuddle me, which leads me to...Okay, change the entry now. I'm serious. Change it. Fine. Be that way. But you're going to miss it. See, now you're changing since I told you you'd miss something.